Can I be me?
I woke up this morning to the smells of an early rush off to work from a friend. Said a quick goodbye and off she went. I then received food for the kids from the ex and within minutes off he went. I decided to call the school and get things in order for my son. A few phone calls later I was done.
I jumped on social media. Then jumped off social media. Now I sit and ponder on things relative. Or maybe just things that are relative to me.
I’d like to speak on or maybe even vent on the things invisibly right in my face. But I won’t. I actually seen about 50 people doing that online. To no avail. Is there a platform for being yourself? Not the best self that is put forward everyday. Hell I can do that in my sleep. Sh** who am I kidding. I do, do that in my sleep. I sleepwalk through this mess on a daily.
This mess of wake up want more, get more then repeat. I often think what if there wasn’t more. Nothing more. Like the people who have had their countries and homes destroyed by unnatural disasters. When a slate is clean there’s only room to recreate. To begin something one must start with nothing. If life was a monopoly game we’re all in jail waiting on the next person to pass go. Should we speak on it? Can I speak on it.
Guess I just did.
I can say that it isn’t enough. But enough of what? What am I looking for? Because obviously I don’t see it. Don’t get me wrong. The strategy of a hamster wheel has worked for eons. If it ain’t broke don’t try to fix it. Or maybe we could wipe the slate clean.
If people can be deported back from a country they worked to be in without any real regard to their contributions then we could reset the whole system and forget the rules not made by us.
I had a wicked vision. I’m gonna keep it real. It was horrific. Picture the purge on steroids. The fall of society. It felt like redemption for the oppressed and opportunities for the deceiving. There is no reward for being successfully sustained.
I open my mind to variations of this vortex. This earth ,this place. I’ve written blogs about the environment and the social nonsense of status. I’m living in the now right along with so many souls needing a megaphone to be heard. Still I zen out and let the lotus flower take over my spirit and calm my electric wiring of mind body and soul.
With no disrespect intended but fuck this shit. At least for today. Today I’m going to be focused on things that have nothing to do with nothin.
I read somewhere that it’s crazy or insane to believe in a higher power. I read somewhere that it was insane. Let me say that again.
I read somewhere that someone’s opinion mattered.
I’m not sure if it was the extra letters that they paid to put in front of their name. Or the fact that they got to put their opinion in a national spotlight. Maybe they had influencers pushing for that ideal to be available for the masses to see. But who the hell cares? Why should I care what that persons idea of insanity means?
For that matter why the hell should I care about anyone’s opinion other than my own? People have been not giving a sh** since the dawn of time. Who am I to say that it’s wrong or right. But I will say this then. Why do we care to conform?
We are waiting for breaks. Housing is needed. Food is needed. Clothing is needed. At least I need it. I don’t know about you. But there’s literally clothes sitting in people’s garages. Given to places that make the needy pay to get it. But that’s the system that we bought into. Blood, sweat and tears.
The forefathers founded it. So that’s what I was told in school. But I’m now wondering if I told myself that all that information was just bullying by the history writers and that I no longer have to listen to it. Would it even matter?
There’s no racism unless your racist. If you see people as people there’s no color boundaries. Zero. Boundaries. If you feed the hungry with your surplus there’s no hunger. If you cloth the naked with the clothes that no longer mean anything to you there’s no naked. If people were allowed to roam the land and build whatever housing they could make there would be no homeless. The world belongs to everyone but somehow a few people put a price on it and the rest of us agreed to pay….
But I’m not a follower or a fan. Lies I tell myself daily.
I’m gonna eat a banana. Zen my mind out and namaste my way through this day.
Wishing you a forgettable Thursday because I promise you it will be forgotten… eventually 🌞