To be moved

The old Tymers would talk about being moved in the spirit. Letting the astral plane talk to your human frequencies and whisper you a word of advice.

Today I heard a bit of advice for myself. To keep trying. To keep envisioning the pace that I’m supposed to go at. To keep loving and looking up. Even when the world has it’s theory on how things should be. 

I’m hoping your day is filled with laughter and wonders. 

Let peace be with you and yours,

Happy Sunday 

Xoxo- Kandee 

I love victories 

Stories where you are victorious are some of the best told stories around. Through history people have been passing on the triumphs of life’s victories.

Mine had a lot of cursing in it. It was the Sam Jackson version. 

Left Arizona for Nebraska Friday afternoon a little after 3pm. Rode through New Mexico like a champ. Then I got stopped by border police. Go figure. 

After shaking in my imaginary boots waiting on that hard green bench with my sons. We got the okay to leave. Thank goodness! 

We take off and head towards my auntie’s house close to Dallas. Seeing her and the family was great. She gave a us a great surprise and put us up in a nice Fairfield Marriott. After we left there we headed to Dallas. 

Let me talk about Dallas’s interstate….whyyyyyyyy!? Why are there so many overpasses? Scary loopy overpasses. After a complete breakdown I refused to drive anymore of them and decided to go the long way around.

It turned out to be a great detour. Oklahoma was packed with my native history. Something we missed out on coming through the first time. I’m super excited I got to check it off my bucket list. 

I managed to stay up the full 14 hours and got through the ice. Being a full 5 degrees anything that had any kind of moisture iced right up. Hitting that welcome to Nebraska sign was like seeing a pot of gold. Heavenly.

I’m thankful that we completed the mission. We handled our business. We managed a little turn up and got back safe and sound. Next time I get the big ideal to drive across America…. stop me…. seriously.  I pushed pass my limits. I drove in places I didn’t even believe I could. I slept outside gas stations and barely ate. I did it for myself and for my children, but man. The victory wasn’t just ours. When I couldn’t see myself driving another mile. I prayed. When I couldn’t see myself staying awake. I prayed. When I was so stressed out that I couldn’t think straight. I prayed. The victory isn’t mine alone and I’m loving that. I really do have a universal comforter in my times of need. 

It’s Monday! Take time to celebrate your victories big and small. We only have one life to live so live it and enjoy every second while you can.
C. L Cunningham 

Happy Monday everyone! Enjoy it. ❄️

Photos courtesy of

Designer lifestyle 

Deep meditation. Listening to music that calms the mind, body and spirit. Songs that bring me mental cleansing. Staying quiet in the mind brings fuel to survival.

Everyday is another lesson. School is in session and I’m learning more than I can fully understand at this point. The way my life changes is unnerving at best. At times I think why bother? No one will miss the things that I’ve always brought to the table. No one will notice when the keys no longer stroke and I no longer have anything else to say.

So I say the things that come to mind anyway. Without an audience there’s no reason to be impressive. To try harder. I can be myself and never worry about acceptance. The power that comes with always being enough is transforming. Empowering souls. To ignore anything that doesn’t belong in your story is taking back your energy and focusing it somewhere that truly fulfills your soul.

I design my destiny. I hand picked my way to be. 

I decided that I’m going to have a wonderful life. I decided who I expose myself to everyday. I’m thankful that my story includes a higher understanding of the universe around me. I seek truth and it continues to set me free. Why lie about who I am to please anyone other than myself? No one is in this room with me. When I wake up and go to sleep nothing else is included in my journey to tomorrow. I’m particularly puzzled by the need to pretend. I’m too damn tired of pretending.

If I walk this time of my life with nothing but my truth then I’m in control of my thoughts. I never wanted anything to interfere with my wants. To change my mind. I absolutely hate finding out information that makes me question a persons character. Or things that make me question authority. Things that make me question God. 

I would much rather walk into neverland get biscuits with the mad hatter and blow smoke at the circle of life. 

Sounds fun huh? But is it fulfilling?

Today I will have a better day than yesterday. 

I will decide to let go of anything that doesn’t make me smile. I will experience the strength it takes to decide if I love myself enough to be happy. Putting happiness in society hands will leave me battered,broken and discouraged. I’m done with that. 

I’m beautiful. I’m wiser. I’m grateful that I am here. I’m incredibly important to those who love me. Those who really have my best interest at heart. I’m a piece of their story. I belong. They are a piece of my story therefore they belong to me also. 

Living can be amazing. I’m ready to be surrounded by love and the only way to do so is to be love myself.

C.L Cunningham 

Tell someone that you love them today but first start with yourself 💙

Love n light

Photos courtesy of


We don’t all take the same path.

I’m learning that everyday. 

It’s the journey to self discovery that sent me on my current path. I’m starting to wonder if I ever wanted to be found. 

Nevertheless here I am. Open as I can be. Ready and willing for all to see his grace and mercy coming shining bright out of me.

I’m alone but not lonely.  The spirits keep me sane. Anytime I’m in need of help I instantly call out the Lord’s name.

I picked my path. My feet are certainly on the ground. If I believe in you, then those are the one’s that I want around. 

I don’t need other’s to do what I’ve done. No one needs to be like me.

Just push out love. Live in your own truth. Encourage peace and let’s all come together in unity with a hint of harmony. 

C. L Cunningham 

Live your truth 


Coming home 

I finally hit my breaking point. 

I’m ready to head back to my home town. I’m ready to move on to a new chapter of my life. 

I tried to be everything to everyone. I’ve grown tired.

The love I want doesn’t seem to want me again. The future isn’t looking the way I planned it to look.

I’m saddened by all the obstacles that keep making themselves my acquaintance. 

I’ve tried walking away from my purpose. Repeatedly. And it keeps calling me home.

Destiny seems to want me to bring light into darkness but sometimes people fall in love with the dark.

I called my parents and told them I was ready to come home. I talked to God and prayed and welped. I feel like I hit rock bottom. 

I’m once again weary. I’m once again leery of what’s ahead of me.

But I’m at peace with my decision. 

I am at no means holy or ordained. I smoke. I drink wine. I cuss when annoyed or angry. Hell I cuss just to cuss.

But I know that when I find my place in this world, this universe, this milky way.  The Lord and his angels are always gonna be right by my side. And I know everything will be alright. 

I’m gonna leave you with a song. Maybe it will give you peace of mind. Maybe it will bless you.  Maybe it will allow the Lord to ask you to come on home closer to him. If not that hopefully it will brighten your day. 

C. L Cunningham 


I guess some assume that love has no worries…

Someone tweeted a question. Is love a feeling or choice? I say that love is both. And so much more.

Love looks different to different people. 

Love is an indescribable immeasurable notion. 

It’s ever changing but remains the same.

It’s the power to move on and it’s the power to move forward. 

The love I have for God is spiritual. It sends light in darkness and hope in sadness. And goodness in kindness.

The love I have for others is heartfelt and pushes my barriers to care above my own selfish ego.

The love I have for him… well…

C. L Cunningham 

Ever growing. Ever changing. Forever grateful. 


Saint and Sinner 

Duality. Each side of an coin.

The ying and yang. 

To love God and do good work is considered a saint. To hold your values to bible standards. 

To do things opposite of the laws and bi-laws of the bible is considered a sinner. 

I’m currently cleaning up past mistakes. I  would be considered born again. Making myself a new in the spirit. 

But my future may be different than my realities now.

So am I a saint or a sinner?

Can I be saintly and still choose something opposite of traditional biblical principles?

So many of us do.

Believe in one thing but do another. And then we are punishing ourselves for our choices. 

Believe that whatever it is your after may come with some struggles but it’s worth the battle if in the end you are happy with your decisions.

C. L Cunningham 

Am I 

I woke up today…

I’m thankful for that. 

Yesterday I wasn’t in the best headspace. 

Yesterday my patience was low and my sadness was high. 

I got up expecting to have a fun filled day.  I was going to take my youngest son swimming.  He’s a teenager but a young one by autism and not age so he would have enjoyed it. The others declined the offer to go swimming with mom. I’m kool but not quite that cool if you get my parent vibe. 

Instead of just walking to the pool I googled it instead. Boy oh boy was I disappointed. 

It didn’t have a wade part. No water slide or even diving boards. I like seeing folks diving off the board. Hearing the splash. Enjoying the laughter or cheers. 

The children yelling in joy when they slide down. And this public pool had none of that. So I threw that plan out and watched a movie instead. I laughed a little and relaxed some.

But the I felt another irritation of thoughts and then a pain here and another there. And I began to feel negative. 

The day ended fairly peaceful and I got to wakeup and start over.

I feel blessed. 

I could have went to sleep and my last day in my mind could have been filled with what I perceived as pain. But I didn’t. I woke up more peaceful more excited and more happy. 

C. L Cunningham 

I wish that your today is happier than your yesterday. And your tomorrow more enjoyable than your today.

Love n light 

Let go

I’m a true romance watcher. I love where boy meets girl and they fall in love. I’m all for the forbidden romance that has to fight for it’s love. I even love the ones where one doesn’t realize that they are in love to almost the end of the movie. 

But my life isn’t a movie. 

And love in the traditional sense has yet to find me. The search for it has taken me on a rollercoaster ride or two (maybe three lol). But I haven’t found one to fillful me. And sometimes I have to let go of false reality when I think I found it and it’s not right.

So I started to look upward. And inward. The world is a tricky place. Friends could be foes behind your back. And you aren’t always the life of the party. Sometimes your not even invited. 

Which is just fine.

Finding my own lane is of utmost importance. I was searching for me and I found a weird world that I don’t fit in to. I want love but not if the price is my sanity and my peace of mind.

I’m fine with being less than in the eyes of the world. If it means gaining a life that’s more pleasing to my walk with the most high. And I’m not trying to to preach to you. I’m not a preacher. I’m just a storyteller telling you my story. 

I wish my fairy tale started today. The thing I work hard for is love. I don’t care about anything else on this whole planet.

 Not a job, not material things, not anything but love. I’ll go wherever the wind takes me to find it. And if I can’t see it in the horizon I’ll keep it moving until I do.

Right now my heart broken but it’s of my own doing and I’ll take responsibility for that. My eyes are looking upward and my heart is full with the love of a higher power. 

Hopefully I can change the world with with one word. But today I’ll settle for just changing my mind. 

C. L Cunningham 

Searching for a love that belongs to me 💙

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