It’s early morning and I’ve been up thinking 💭.

About how my life turned out to be the way it is now.

I just got engaged to my ex husband. It literally sounds weird to say that.

No-one else has been supportive of that decision but the children. Let me sit in that statement.

The ones who were in the home with us are the ones who believe that we can build a better foundation for the future.

They seen the struggle the arguments and the shatter of the marriage. Yet in still our support is coming from the place of hope.

I’m not sorry for trying things that others have said no to. I’m just trying to live with all of the choices I’ve made in the past. Taking them to the realists truths that I can find and hopefully moving forward in peace.

My punishment is my own self esteem being broken into pieces every time I chase something that makes me feel pain, sadness and anger.

I beat myself up after the haze has cleared. When no one is around I analyze my actions over and over again.

This time I want to look back and say I did exactly what I needed to do to be able to wake up in the morning with a positive start and a smile on my face.

– C L Cunningham

Happy Thursday everyone may it bring you happiness, love, and abundance.




Just lead me to the machine 

In a society where the powers that rule over us and watch over us. Are serverly tainted in blood money and contradictory control. We are called to rage against the machine that separates us. Like the music group I guess that I too may be a person who rages against inequality and the bullshit that cloaks us into submission.

The prim and proper way of being a woman in this establishment is not within me. The social economic ways of the past can be no more. But that’s just an opinion. Hell that is more than an option. It can become a way of life. 

As the world turns and the earth decays until it slowly evaporates us into thin air. I call on you to move forward. I may be confined into a mental jail of my own locking with the key hanging around my neck like a noose. But my courage with stands anything that can be dangled before me. 

I want what is best for the world. But my idealism and fuck you attitude may be a cross a little too big for most to bare. So be it. It still doesn’t fix the system to not speak on injustice. Nothing fixes the system if the people failed have nothing else to do but point the finger and shuffle the feet of the protesters. Continue to confuse the minds of the enlightened and hungry. And divide the world into pieces of broken hearts and shattered families. 

Michael Jackson said it best when he screamed and told us to just leave me alone. I thought flying high meant making it great. I thought speaking your personal truth made it strong. I thought the hearts of the wounded wanted a stance to bring forth a decline in control and an uprising of equality. The system is broken. The system has been designed to fail.

 On purpose. 

This was not an accident waiting to happen it was a joke on humanity.

C. L Cunningham 

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