Wanderful 

Having the ability to switch from intellectual hogwash to an emotional mud fight in a split second is no easy feat. What’s even more amazing is that everyone does it. Growing up I was taught that certain traits are feminine or masculine. 

I’m beginning to see that most of those gender rules are wrong.

Everyone hurts. Everyone cries. Everyone has emotions. Everyone has intellect. One gender isn’t better than the other. Centuries of wasted propaganda. Keeping the divide alive between the sexes. Keeping the confused in a state of confusion. Branding the lies with posters and media coverage. 

  Looking through a telescope of information for guidance. Searching for answers for the future. When I am the person who decides what my future is. I keep reaching out but maybe I should just keep looking upwards.

My daily heroes are regular people. The family that helps the community. The man who opened the door me. The teenager who carried bags for me. The unique way of being a blessing when there’s nothing to give. Reaching inside and sharing a piece of oneself. These things are priceless. 

 
I’m acknowledging that I could not survive alone in California. 

My decision to come here wasn’t planned out correctly.

It’s been a hard pill to swallow. 

Thankful is an understatement when it comes together with my gratitude for all the things that have helped us succeed here.

I plan to explore more. Complain less and put my best foot forward.

C.L Cunningham 

Hoping for days filled with adventure this winter season

Photo https://www.pinterest.com/pin/642677809297086474/

        http://www.weheartit.com
Art Army

Monday motivational 

Argh.

It’s morning. Monday morning to be exact.

What it is about Monday’s? That feeling of meh hits me right off the back. I swear I opened one eye and was thinking hell no. Then I instantly decided to change my attitude.

Get myself up and start off the chores of the day. I have a list of things to do and I’ve already crossed something off 😂.

It’s the push and the pull. The gusto to power through. Actually it’s the will to get started. But I like to jazz it up. Hell it sounds better.

  
Today is a great day to have a great day. Life is at the palm of my hands and hope brings more change than fear. So I’m going to be hopeful,helpful,loving and kind today.

I’m going to sprinkle as many smiles as I can everywhere I go. 

C.L Cunningham 

Sending you a smile.😊🌈

Photo https://www.pinterest.com/pin/76631631139233557/

Treat me better

Early Sunday morning and I’m having a conversation with some of the fellas in the house. Real life is revealing it’s true self everyday.

As I listen. I learn the magnitude of my own mistakes. Improving my attitude toward others is always a constant battle for me.

I’m taking a real survey of my thinking process now a days. As I’m in a state of wondered later on this afternoon I had a moment of frustration.

I started to think. Why am I still waiting for life to treat me better? The key word is waiting. It implies that someone or something else is in charge. As the thought floated through my mind I decided to write it down. To come back to this concept.

  
4:15pm and I’m still stumped. 

Is it the amount of emphasis that I put on others to do what I want? Is it the amount of time that I waste hoping someone else will understand my wants and needs? Is it the lack of information that I am receiving or giving out that causes setbacks?

Looking into my own crystal ball 🔮 and I have to continue to find the strength to withstand my own issues.

Life has so much in store for me. Today I just want to be thankful for all of my joys.

C.L Cunningham 

Photo https://www.etsy.com/listing/118082866/print-journey-drawing-on-distressed?utm_source=Pinterest&utm_medium=PageTools&utm_campaign=Share

Party over here

  
Happy days are all around. Here ye here ye. The fun has begun… meh

Yesterday and today we have had two birthdays in the house whoop whoop. We still have another to go. Sounds super exciting and it is. A little sweet affection to sprinkle around.

Nights like tonight are cool memories in the current time frame of life.

Hearts are filled with party favors. Helium balloons just waiting to fly away into a truly happy place.

C.L Cunningham 

Sending you love n light🎉🎭🦋

Photo Pinterest 

Art Army 

To you 

“I love you and I want to be loved but I just don’t knowww how to tell you.” Belts out of the speakers. Deep cries of an aching man’s soul.
Resonating with my thoughts.
Reading 📖 a book ,hearing a song, words from a friend. All pause when I start to search for you.
 My night consists of searching for stars. Looking for celestial beauty to rain down. Feeling the 54 degree mountain wind.
Purposely letting time pass. 
Can’t really talk about the past. The present is out of control. The future is around the corner.
How’s your night?
What’s coming out your speakers?
Surrounded by a room full of people right now trying to reach for you.
Hate when I’m late to respond. Guess it’s still new.
Guess it’s the same on either side of this fence.
Missing you daily.
  
C.L Cunningham 

Photo https://www.pinterest.com/pin/353814114465786121/

The road marked “do not enter”

  
Friday oh dear Friday look what you have shown me……

 When I decided to check on my heart I wasn’t expecting more unwanted  attention.

 Once again a decision was starring at me and I had to think on my feet.

 Rather quickly I knew what I wanted to do. Now the problem begins when I know what I want but it seems harder than expected to reach.

 There are roadblocks that I accidentally place in my life when I’m not in full understanding of my mission. My destiny. It’s hard to move forward when even I doubt the belief of my dreams coming true.

This morning was a hard look at myself that ended with a renew sense of self.

The roads that used to be marked under construction are now open and I’m excited to see what is ahead. I’m thankful. I’m feeling better. I’m open to learn more. 

The people in my life are important enough to make sacrifices for. I questioned that before and now I understand that it wasn’t a need for me to worry.

  
C. L Cunningham

Sending you hope, and love in abundance 🌞🌻🦋

Photo https://www.pinterest.com/pin/8655424264479680/

Pinterest 

Bff

Sitting leg propped and crisscrossed at the ankle. Thinking about you.

Remembering days when the thought of was my lifeline into sanity.

Seeing your smile made days worthwhile to begin with. 

Looking for a way out and a way straight into your arms meant that the best days were to come.

Asking you what your scent smells of. And telling you to eat more eggs in the morning. “It’s not enough food for yo big ass”. I laugh to myself thinking about the questions I’d ask. 

Naively believing your every word. 

Unexpected….

Things are not what was expected.

My fault. Skeletons in the closet are having a coming out party and I wasn’t invited. Never even seen the invitation.

  
Immobility of stature. Concrete ways combined to stone faced responses are smothering the fire that once burned so brightly.

I’ll never be able to forget you.

I’m never over you. We haven’t officially started. 

Can we…. start?

  
Against all odds.

Each and everyday I look to you for hope.

Wondering if today is the day that I forget how we started.

My love wants to speak your language.

Cypher your codes and breach your defense mechanism.

  
I’m scared, scarred and alone. In a foreign exchange project pre designed to cause chaos.

I need my friend. My daily hero.

I miss you being you.

I’m lost. This wilderness is feeling cold without you.

Holding on. 

Watching for your heart to show up.

  
C.L Cunningham 

Photos

https://www.shopartcenter.com/products/fabio-napoleoni-good-things-come-to-those-who-wait-metal-limited-metal-9-x-21-edition-of-35?utm_campaign=Pinterest 

 https://www.behance.net/gallery/24783923/Off-We-Go

Love saw it arrive

Pleasure and painful occurrences.

The double sided coin of forget and forgive.

Thursday is no different from the rest. 

A testimony to the strife of daily activities and corrupted communication gaps.

  
Either way the day still has to motor through into nightfall. There’s no stopping that. Since I kind of have my feelings on lockdown I’m not going to put a lot of attention on the hurt.

Annoyed by the speed of previewed happiness,I wait some more.

Productive waiting. 

Multi-tasking in my life.

Making an effort to be better at receiving the beautiful blessings of lessons still teaching me right from wrong. My stronghold on words excel in my frustration.

Yet I remain calm.

To right the wrongs from previous mishaps. 

Changing my mind on views that have been deeply rooted in my soul.

Letting go is easier than holding on to the thoughts that I’m telling myself in the mist of my ego trip.
  
Wanting things to end up fantastically stellar is a myth that I tell myself.

Actually just wanting things to feel better daily. Wanting to improve on how I make others feel daily. I can do better at that. I haven’t reached the finishline yet. 

Being human has its pros and cons. It’s highs and lows. It’s gains and loses. I’m just trying to make it all fit into a picture perfect frame called acceptance.

C. L Cunningham 

Photo https://www.pinterest.com/pin/424112489891839990/

Truth magnified 


Wednesday midday and I’m dog tired.

Too much going on but not enough is going on. I’m not sure how to explain it.

Time slowly ticking on the clock.

Product of circumstance and flaws on steroids. Today is a picture of encouragement. Still putting the things in order and checking off boxes.

Figuring out what’s next. Is exhausting when your directions are off and the compass is broke.

Thank goodness for perseverance.

Squinting through the dirty glasses I’ve been looking out of. Taking the time to restore them to their normal view and placing faith in wanting to grow more. To know more about the possibility of change. To drive toward the sunset and actually enjoy the ride.

C.L Cunningham

Wednesday 🌻🌞

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